Prioritizeism

"You have time for that which you make time for" - NJ

How many days have you felt overwhelmed by all the 'To-Do List', that race through your mind? On those days, it is amazing as quickly as things are added to that list, not so quickly do they get accomplished. Sure enough, one some are completed, more are just added, as if they multiply themselves while waiting for you to get around to them.

How do you prioritize the list? How do you stop letting it multiply? How do you stop stressing over that big list that has no ending?

You buy Post-it notes!! The smaller, the better. These days they make them so small you can barely get more that a word or two written on them. Write out you 'To-Do List'. If you use the small ones you might have to use a lot of them, but then you have one task per post-it note so you take on one task at a time. Writing out your 'To-Do-List', frees up room within your mind to think clearly. As you accomplish each task, toss it out, let it go, be done with it…Mission accomplished. One less thing to do.

Have a look at your 'To-Do List' that is now written out on post-it notes. Ask yourself these questions as you look at each task.

1)Can I mix it up somehow so it is less stressful to accomplish?

Instead of having a mundane, day-to-day chore that stresses you even before you have begun trying to accomplish it… Mix it up by bringing life into the moment. When you are out buying groceries, (a task on your 'To-Do List'), you are buying milk, bread, toilet paper. Yes, toilet paper, you know we all have the common need for toilet paper. Can you recall a time of doing this task that was any different than the hundreds of times you have entered the same store to make the same purchases? This time, mix it up. You can walk up and down the aisles staring down at your grocery list, passing by and around may other shoppers and you might have done in the past or you could mix it up. Start by looking up. Smile. Look around you. Are all the people you see doing the same robotic thing as you usually do? Does anyone look as if they are enjoying themselves? Maybe today is the day you will be different, you will enjoy yourself. Make eye contact with the fellow shopper. Have a quick lil chat with someone. You never know, you might learn something new, like what does that person use that fruit for, you know the one that you always see but have no idea what it taste like or what to do with it. You could be surprised what new things you could learn just by interacting with someone in a grocery store. I remember my mom once seen a lady in the produce department. She was curiously watching this lady who was placing a single straw from a straw broom onto a watermelon. She watched her for several minutes, as she placed this piece of broom straw on several melons before finally choosing one to put in her cart. Curiosity got the best of my mother and she walked up to the lady and asked what she was doing with the piece of straw and melons. The lady smiled and was pleasantly welcoming to her and willing to explain by showing her what she had been doing. The lady carefully balanced the straw from the broom onto the melon, making sure that nothing else but the melon came in contact with the straw on the melon. She told my mom, "The straw will tell me if the melon is ripe or not". She continued to explain, "If the melon is ripe, the straw will start to move, the more ripened the melon is, the more rotation the straw will have. If the melon is not ripe and ready, the broomstick straw will not move at all. She swore by this. My mother shared this story with me and yes, I as well as my mother, have since been seen placing a single straw from a broomstick on many melons. If you should ever want to try this, it works on any kind of melon and straw brooms are usually found in the cleaning isle. Amazing what you can learn when you are willing to mix it up. Not every trip to the store will bring unusual tricks to learn, even just smiles between strangers or kind words spoken could brighten both your day and the ones you interact with. When you do the same thing, the same way, you get the same results. Learn to mix it up so you can change the day to day routines.

2) Do I get any happiness from doing this?

If you have a list of tedious task before you that you are dreading, things you procrastinate doing, find a way to add some happiness into doing them. Let's say washing a sink full of dirty dishes is not your cup of tea. You put it off, yet the dishes still keep piling up until there is not a single cup in the cupboard to use. Now you are forced to wash them. You know they surely won't wash themselves. How could you possibly enjoy washing these dishes, the one thing you avoid as long as you possibly can? As you wash these dishes, start thinking of how these dishes got dirty in the first place. Who used these dishes? Who drank from this glass, who ate from this fork? Was it you? Did the drink that had been in this glass quench your thirst? Was it your favorite drink? Was the meal that was eaten off this plate, with this fork, a delicious meal? Who did you share this meal with? When you think about how all these dishes got dirty, you can be thankful for the meals, the people who are in your lives that these dishes provided their services to. You are thinking about life, your life. Ta-Da… dishes are done. Instead of focusing on the tedious, dreadful task, you took a moment to quietly reflect on life. You added happiness into the task which probably made it less irritating. Even if it is only you that made these dishes dirty, you are still alive to enjoy life making these dishes dirty again and again. Learn to add happiness to the things you do.

3) Will doing this task create a lasting memory for me or for someone else?

Do you stress over how clean your house is or how nice your lawn looks? That will be the day when a house cleans itself or the lawn mows itself. If you are obsessed and always stressing over how meticulous everything in your home is, how pristine your lawn looks, you are instilling that memory in those around you. You will be remembered for having the cleanest house, for having the perfect lawn and to those who really know you, for being stressed about it all. If that is how you want to be remembered long after you are gone, then go for it. If not, then clean when you can. Spend time doing the things that make the memories, the things that matter to you, what you want to be remembered for. This way you can enjoy the cleaning process because you are now doing it by choice, not because you have to. Ask any child what matters more to them, having a clean house or having time spent with you? You can learn a valuable lesson from that child. They simplify stress by speaking the truth as they know it. They are wise beyond their years as they have not yet been corrupted into creating stress over creating memories. Learn to make memories while you are living.

4) Will it matter 20 years from now?

The answer, probably not. Most things we allow to stress us in our life, doesn't really last. Time moves on, so will whatever is happening now. We replace one stress with another because we move past each one. Asking yourself, Will it matter to me in 20 years, eliminates the minimal stresses, allowing you to place your focus on what will matter now and 20 years from now. You will have less stress because you will no longer be spread so thin dealing with several mini stresses, as you let them go, you can deal with the bigger ones. The perfectly clean house, the pristinely mowed lawn, the clean spotless dishes, will they matter 20 years from now? Trut me, you will have 20 years of house cleaning and it will still need to be cleaned. Maybe not today but it will tomorrow. 20 years of lawn mowing and that grass will still be growing. 20 years of washing dishes and they will be dirty many more times. Learn what will matter in 20 years from now and focus more time on that.

You will feel more satisfied with what you accomplish in a day and you will know it matters to you. It may take some time to reprogram yourself when dealing with stress and prioritizing your 'To-Do List'. Start by asking these questions and also understand, most people create their own stress. Let's go back to the clean house again. If you are stressing over someone coming to your house and it is not as spotless as you want it to be, worrying over what they may thing, you just created your own stress. You do not know what they will think. Are they coming to visit you or just to look at your house to see how clean it is? If it is the latter, then when they come over, give them the keys so they can come clean your house. There is nothing wrong with having a clean home, unless you are stressing over it and have no time to live because you are always cleaning. Remember a lived in looking house means you are living.

Understanding why you are stressed or overwhelmed with your 'To-Do List' helps to alleviate the stress by prioritizing what matters.

"Mix it up, find happiness in what you do, do what matters, create memories" - NJ